A different take on gender rules

From time to time those lists of gender rules circulate. There is one set from the ladies telling men what the rules are and another from the men telling women what the rules are. I’ve even printed versions on this web site. In talk.origins Louann gave us a better version. Here is what she had to say:

The last time I saw this list posted (not here) I suggested fairly seriously that the problem with both men and women is that too many of them are heterosexual. Or rather, they’re heterosexual but don’t LIKE each other in other ways. Imagine a better world…

Male 1: I’m horny. But the bowl game is on in ten minutes.
Male 2: Let’s do it facing the television in case it takes too long.

Female 1: Let’s go antiquing this weekend and then design some scrapbook pages about the trip.
Female 2: What a great idea!

Male 1: I don’t want to have kids. All those diapers and sh*t and not being able to go out drinking whenever you want.
Male 2: Me neither.

Female 1: Let’s have an adorable little baby! We can do the nursery in cream yellow and mint green, so it fits a boy or a girl. And we can change the little outfits six times a day.
Female 2: Awwww. That’s so wonderful. (cries with joy).

Male 1: That woman who was here the other day said we had two inches of grease and hair around the sides of the bathtub. Do you want to clean it?
Male 2: No.
Male 1: Me neither. We’ve got to stop letting her come over.

Female 1: What if we redid the lounge in a warm taupe, and then covered that wing chair in burgundy so it would really POP?

Female 2: Let’s talk about that for a long time. Granted, the men would die of flesh-eating bacterial infections and toxic amounts of junk food. And the women would starve after spending all their money on craft supplies. But at least nobody would be put to the trouble of listening to each other.