In the beginning was the plan
And then came the assumptions
And the assumptions were without form
And the plan was completely without substance
And the darkness was upon the face of workers
And they spoke among themselves, saying
“It is a crock of shit and it stinketh.”

And the workers went upon their supervisors and sayeth,
“It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof.”
And the supervisors went unto their managers and sayeth unto them
“It is a container of excrement and it is very strong,
such that none may abide by it.”

And the managers went unto their directors and sayeth,
“It is a vessel of fertilizer, none may abide its strength.”
And the directors spoke amongst themselves, saying one to another,
“It contains that which aid plant growth, and it is very strong.”
And the directors went unto the vice presidents and sayeth unto them,
“It promotes growth and is exceedingly powerful.”

And the vice presidents went unto the president and sayeth unto him,
“This new plan will actively promote the growth and efficiency
of this company, and these areas in particular.”
And the president looked upon the plan,
And saw that it was good, and the plan became policy,

And this is how shit happens.