Monkey Evolution March (sung to the tune of “Battle Hymn of the Republic”)

Mine eyes have seen the coming of the monkey from his tree.
He is standing at the forest edge a tad unsteadily.
Now he is walking on the plain a-bending of his knee.
He keeps evolving on.

Monkey, monkey eat banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.

As he goes walking on the plain he utters not a screech.
His tiny brain is struggling for the sounds beyond its reach.
Until at last he has the rudiments of basic speech.
He keeps evolving on.

Monkey, monkey say banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.

And while he stands upon his feet his hands are free to use.
His tiny brain imagining the futures it could choose.
As he keeps making all the tools which will the world abuse.
He keeps evolving on.

Monkey, monkey cut banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.

See now the world is full of monkeys spreading by the score.
Such crowding leads to conflict and the conflict leads to war.
And watch those tiny monkeys building bombs on ev’ry shore.
He keeps evolving on.

Monkey, monkey bomb banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.

And now the war is over smoke is rising to the sky.
There stands a lonely monkey now and he is wondr’ng why.
Away he walks into the woods and heaves a mighty sigh.
He won’t evolve no more.

Monkey, monkey no banana (x3).
He won’t evolve no more.