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This a traditional letter column.
You are encouraged to write a letter of comment on anything that you
find worthy of comment. It will (may) be published in this column along
with my reply. As editor I reserve the right to delete material;
however I will not alter the undeleted material. E-mail to me that solely
references the contents of this site will be assumed to be publishable
mail. All other e-mail is assumed to be private. And, of course, anything
marked not for publication is not for publication. Oh yes, letters of
appreciation for the scholarly resources provided by this site will be
handled very discreetly. This page contains the correspondence for
April 2000.
I have been receiving quite a bit of peculiar because
the mutant watch page has a link to
my Are mutations harmful? page. I have gathered
them together in their own page.
From: Wmolly
Is amazing! How long did it take you to design it? By the way when will the
xmen movie come out? Will it be in theaters or at the video stores?
My understanding is that the movie will come out in July.
Hello Friend,
we need your help in order for our Website
If you are interested, please contact:
[email protected]
Much as I admire your approach I fear that I cannot
fit your enterprise into my investment schedule. I must
admit that I am quite curious as to whether you will
actually catch any fish with this particular troll.
Cheerily,
Richard Harter
From: WKosl
I’m interested in where i can find a car attachment that i’ve seen as follows:
A Christian fish symbol, but with two legs and the word “Darwin” within it.
Can you tell me where I can get this?
From: Kell Crider
Thanks for posting the letters you have received as a result of the link to
your site from mutantwatch.com. Made my day. Are you still receiving them?
I’ll check the page again. I’ll be back to check out other corners of your
site. Your humorously thoughtful responses to the aforementioned emails have
piqued my interest.
If you enjoy my responses to the mutant letters you may well enjoy the rest of
the site. It is, er, eccentric.
Dear sir,
1.On hedgehogs
with attitude problems thinking they’re wolverines:
The proofs of algebraists are either trivial or incomprehensible – often both at
the same time.
Note: i clearly talk about lambs as an entity. The specific lamb that
gets intimate knowledge about stew does not jump anymore.
Michel
From: “TBundy”
Good luck DHMO is water.
I have over the past few years heard some of these stories. One question
comes to mind. If any of these stories are true, (and I don’t mean the
urban legends either), How do we verify their authenticity. Grace
My apologies if this seems dry or if I am rehashing familiar
material. However the point is that it takes considerable
effort and care together with cross-checking by several
people to ensure that a source is really reliable.
Most of the sources for these stories are unreliable. You
cannot assume that a newspaper story is accurate or complete.
You definitely cannot assume that an email or web page that
purports to be a copy of a newspaper article is in fact an
accurate copy of a legitimate newspaper article. If you really
want to verify a story you are going to have to do some dog
work.
Quite frankly, my Darwin Awards pages and the stories therein
are mostly unverified (some come from sources I trust) and
should be regarded as popular culture. I do have pages which
are scholarly, e.g., the Piltdown Man pages. The difference
between them and the Darwin Arwards pages are quite
striking.
From: CVCCLONG
How can I make my pumpkin grow to weigh 100 pounds. I am in a contest and
I want to win if I can with your help. When you get a chance please
e-mail me with any information when I need to plant the seed and how to
get started. Thank you for your time.
I really wish I could give you definitive advice on the growing
of large pumpkins. Perhaps one of my many readers may have
better advice than that which I can give you.
You will want a considerable area in which to grow your pumpkins;
they should get
good sun. The soil should be well drained and should
be good loam. Plant your seeds (yes, seeds) three or four to a
hill. Water well. Plant well after the danger of frost. Fertilize with
miracle-gro (follow instructions). After the pumpkins have
flowered and set, pinch off all the late blooms and most of the
ones that have set – you want all of the plants growth to go into
that one pumpkin.
As an alternative, consult your local nursery.
Cheerily,
PS: Why me, Lord?
From: Cato Devane
Loved your responses! I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard in a long
time.
Not only is the story about the 181-day voyage of the USS Constitution
implausible based on the reported level of alcoholic consumption, but the
Constitution wasn’t even built until 21 October 1797 – 18 years, 1 month,
and 28 days after the story supposedly took place.
From: Diana Metz
I am curious to know where the original bones of the Piltdown man are now.
Are they kept together somewhere?
From: Jessie2good
escuse me but what is the purose of this web site
I’ll admit I am an X-men fan, and happened across your site via “Senator
Kelly”. I’ve browsed (I use the term browse only because of lack of
time) through your web-site and I must concur with the thoughts of
others, you have a wonderful website, an intellectual’s “rollar
coaster”. I have bookmarked your website and deleted “Senator Kelly’s”.
In one aspect I am sorry for some of the “trash” mail that you have
probably received (ie. X-men rule.You are sick.) from the exposure, but
on the other hand, I am happy that I have had the chance(and will
continue) to view your site. Great job!
I have noticed that there are certain definite entry points into my site.
These include the Piltdown Man page, the Darwin Awards page, the Roast
Camel and Kitty Litter cake pages, the Marine Corps reminisces page,
the “Dancing Slave Girls of Gor” page, and the “Waiting for Godot” page.
The humor pages are the ones that people keep coming back to. Most
people go back out the door that they came in; some people stick around
and browse. Those are my kind of people.
From: “buffie”
Enjoyed your site. Stumbled across it when I typed in Professional Poker
Players in the search engine tonight while reminiscing about last week in
Las Vegas and my education in the Mirage poker room. I was looking for
some insight on how to become better. I appreciated your final sentence
in the poker essay. Do you have any other fine points on playing winning
poker that you might have left out?
All comments welcomed.
A simple bit of advice which covers almost all private games is that most
people don’t raise enough and they call too much, particularly in the later
rounds. The principle is very simple: You don’t want to be in at the end
if you don’t have the best hand. If you have the best hand you should be
raising; if you don’t have it you shouldn’t be in. One of my favorite ploys
was to bet as though I had something other than what I had. For example,
it’s 7 card stud, high-low, with a buy. My first two up cards are an A
and a 2. I’m pushing hard, obviously betting on the come with my low hand.
I catch a K. I raise again but not as vigorously. I pair the deuce. I
just call this time. I get a down card and raise again. I replace the
K and catch a 3. The final round is hot and heavy – one guy with a low
drops out. Another guy who has been sucking wind all the way decides to
go high against the other player who looks like he might have two pair.
I win the entire pot with my aces boat because nobody has gone low against
my obvious “lock low”. I started with wired trip aces. Did you see that
coming? That’s one of the tricks; when you don’t have what your up cards
suggest, bet as though you did. Now let’s supose I had a 3 and a 4 to
start with instead of that pair of bullets. Depending on what else is out
there and who’s playing I have a very good chance of walking away with low
because everybody “knows” I have a lock low.
Other advice. Know your players. Some people make a big effort to keep
track of tells, revealing habits and gestures. I never bothered to do that
consciously; I just trusted impressions. However the important thing is
to notice major patterns, e.g., does a player over-estimate and under-estimate
the value of his hand. One thing I found useful is method acting. For
example, with that hand with the concealed boat, I tell myself “You have
a lock low” and internalize that knowledge. I act like a man with a lock
low because I “know” I have a lock low.
Thanks, Richard. I felt like there was some collusion going on but couldn’t
put my finger on it. I would like to find some private games here in
Midland, Texas where I live, any ideas on where to start and what to look
out for in the private games? I have never looked for any private games in
this area, recently moved here. Thanks, Randy
As to finding private games I’m not sure that I can give you good advice.
Like anything else, you ask around. Ask your doctor or your contractor
if you are having work done. Mention poker casually at work and see if
anyone bites. Be casual but ask. Once you get into a regular game it
isn’t hard to find other games. Most games have some players who play
in more than one game.
The main thing you want to do when you find a game is to be good company.
Don’t be obnoxious, be friendly without being too pushy, don’t be an
excessively tight player, and don’t appear to playing for blood.
Think twice if you seem to be losing regularly and everybody wants you
to play in their game.
From: Levi S Spears
Just wandered by and started reading – I actually found your page via a
link from the ‘Official X-Men Movie’ site, which linked to an obviously
faked page along the lines of Mutantwatch.com, which then had links to
some info on mutations and genetics …
Regardless – much amusement and good reading here – thanks.
A courtesy, I do wish, by the way, that the x-men movie people
had shown.
From: Ted Noel
Kevin O’Brien’s essay on hemostasis simply ignores Behe’s argument. If
any procoagulent evolves, then the animal clots solid. If the regulator
evolves, it bleeds to death. The entire system is required for proper
function. The alleged pedigree of various proteins is interesting, but
simply misses the point. Perhaps he could explain how the evolution
could occur without killing the animal. He must not sit with the
invertebrates for his evolution, because that would be evolving a system
which they neither have nor need. To evolve it for them would be to
divert precious resources, making them less proficient at survival.
It is nice to say that you have refuted Behe, but it is dishonest to do
so when you haven’t even addressed his argument.
If you are interested in making specific objections I would be
willing to post them together with the relevant section of Kevin
O’Brien’s article for commentary.
From: oryan999
if it would be possible i would really appreciate it if you could send
me any pictures you have of car wreaks or accidents. thank you
From: “Morris M. Keesan”
In your February letter column page
the attempted link to the mutant watch page is
www.mutantwatch.com, missing the prefix “http://”, and
so it gets interpreted as a relative link, to the non-existent
“http://www.tiac.net/users/cri/www.mutantwatch.com”.
(not an HTML problem, but probably just a typo: on the Feb. 2000
contents page, toc00feb.html, you’ve re-used the header
“Gender Benders” where I think you meant “Correspondence”;
unless there’s some subtle humor in referring to your correspondents
as gender benders.)
Note: Duly corrected.
From: Alyxander B. Debler
Very well written and constructed. I am an ametuer in the realm of
biology and biochemistry, but found this site very educational, and
explained in a way that is easy to comprehend for a novice.
I’ve been searching for a manuscript of “waiting for godot” online, but
have had no luck. was wondering if, by chance, you knew of a location at
which i could download or view it.
From: “Kirk And Gale”
Just had to email you and tell you how much I enjoyed your cool-headed and
courteous responses to the silly Mutant Letters. I found your site
through the X-Men site as well and I have to say I’ve enjoyed reading
these letters probably more than I will the movie. Thanks for putting
them up.
In the ordinary course of things I wouldn’t have gone to see
the movie but now I expect that I will have to. In a detached
sort of way I’m in it.
From: Oldlady
I can’t believe anyone had the time or energy to compile all this
convoluted nonsense. We enjoyed it.
The Family of Mutants
From: Patty Sims
Thank you for allowing me the privilege of enjoying some of the ramblings
of your fine mind. I would be proud to have a son like you. You give me
hope for the future.
Index of contributors
Other Correspondence Pages
Date: 4/27/2000
Subj: Your site
I’m not sure whether you are referring to my site, the xmen site, or the
mutantwatch site. My site is rather like topsy – it just growed. I did some initial
design and I fiddle with it every once in a while to try to bring it under control.
In the mean time I just keep adding whatever interests or amuses me.
Return to index of contributors
From: the_management
Date: 4/25/2000
Subj: We need your investment now!
http://www.foodmarketexchange.com
http://www.foodmex.com
to grow fast. If you don’t mind we would
like to ask you to invest into our company.
US$ 5,000 – US$ 10,000 would be enough, just
in order to cover our expenses.
Dear sirs,
Return to index of contributors
Date: 4/29/2000
Subj: Darwin stuff
Try the Ring of Fire Enterprises at http://www.rof.com/
Return to index of contributors
Date: 4/28/2000
Subj: mutant victim
I’m still getting them. When the x-men movie site first came up I got a flurry of
them and an absurd number of hits on my site. Things have settled down but
I still get a lot of hits on the mutation page.
I’m sure any interest you may have had has been purged, but you might be
surprised by the writing quality, not to mention the art, in some of the
more thoughtful comic books
I’m an Asterix fan but I’m not sure that counts in the category of thoughtful comic
books. I have my mint condition copy of The Watchmen, of course, but who
doesn’t.
Return to index of contributors
From: Michel Durinx
Date: 4/14/2000
Subj: Hang senator kelly !
a. I am quite certain you did not know that the Afrikaner word for
‘hedgehog’ is ‘krimpvarkie’, or literally ‘wee shrinking pig’;
b. I am quite certain that there is no point in knowing that;
c. I am not sure why I know it.
Concluding line of argument: D. Hofstadter’s books should be kept away from.
Wee shrinking pig – I like that. Hofstadter is excellent for people who wish to
believe that they understand difficult subjects that they do not understand.
2. After months of incidental wandering around and being disappointed in my
search for meaning on the web by discovering the website I wanted to
construct and hence not having to construct it or deal with the tedious
mails like this such a page is bound to engender so being overcome with
spare time I was forced to fill it otherwise. I first considered following
a course on grammar, but seeing that mine was beyond recovery I tossed that
idea aside. So I took up sign language. eh.
Maybe a look into concise writing & getting ideas across might be not too
bad an idea.
Now that is a fine collection of words thrown at a page, blowing and scattering
like leaves in the wind, and catching against the fences of periods to form
the semblence of sentences.
The short version is: an algebrist I mailed your url came across Billy, I
never did in all my wanderings, and now he is unable to locate the game
anymore. Does it actually exist?
Being an algebrist his statement is unverifiable. A much-used concluding
line in a paper is ‘.. it is reduced to an algebraic problem and hence
solved.’ Much like Fermat and his universe being too small.
The original Billy disappeared long ago. My version can be found at
http://richardhartersworld.com/~cri_b/fbilly/fbilly.html.
3. Trilobites
chose to cease living when or before trilobite-casserole and
chili-con-trili were invented. Lambs still jump around stupidly, fully
aware of the fact that stews exist. This clearly shows their relative
intelligence.
Now this is logic I can appreciate. As a former (very former) South Dakota
farm boy I can testify that trilobites, of necessity, are nicer than sheep.
4. I was amazed that your counter read 46, guessing my visits alone would
more than make up half. This not being consistent with the amount of
published correspondence , I now look more closely. I see the point is
that it is ’46.. since 14th of April, 2000′.
AAAAHAHAHHA,,,, I recognize the date.. I was supposed to supervise an exam
at 9:00 on the 14th.. it’s now 17:40 and I will not even be able to
reach any place on earth where its not yet 9:00 to prove I was on time but
had a slight spatial mislocation.
I think “Ooops” is the appropriate technical term. My ISP occasionally wipes
out some of my counters every now and then and I have to reset them. Bad ISP.
I get lots of hits on my site – many more these days thanks to Senator Kelly
whom we both agree should be hung.
Running off to the department’s secretariat,
Fearfully — although no god exists but evil daemons clearly do, and they
live there —,
God explains much that is good in the world; daemons explain much that is not.
Daemons, though less powerful, are evidently much more industrious than God.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 4/14/2000
Subj: DHMO
No. I’m shocked. Who would have guessed it?
Return to index of contributors
From: “Oribhabor”
Date: 4/25/2000
Subj: verification
As a general rule it is very difficult to verify these stories.
Basically what you need is chain of connections that can be
trusted, preferably public sources that can be checked.
Scientific and other scholarly journals invest considerable
effort in making sure that the connections are there. Thus
an article in a scientific journal reporting on an experiment
will report the details of how the experiment was done so
that other people can repeat the experiment. If the report
is on an observation of an event all of the relevant information
will be recorded. References to other works will (should be)
complete enough so that the other works can be examined
and the accuracy of the references checked. Moreover
the material in the journal article, including the references,
will be independently reviewed by referees.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 4/24/2000
Subj: I want to grow a 100 pound pumkin HELP
Dear person,
Return to index of contributors
Richard Harter
Date: 4/25/2000
Subj: Letters to the Editor, X-men Special
Thank you. I can’t take all of the credit. Seldom have I been fed so
many straight lines.
Return to index of contributors
From: Thomas Hammett
Date: 3/8/00
Subj: Old Ironsides
You are quite right; the story has certain elements of implausibility.
I dare say that if you checked the references you would find that
they do not check out. So? It’s a good story anyway.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/24/2000
Subj: Where are the Piltdown bones
The British Museum still has them under lock and key. They don’t
advertise them much.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/26/2000
Subj: urgent reply quickly please
The purpose of this web site is to subtly undermine reality.
Return to index of contributors
From: “hilmash1”
Date: 3/28/2000
Subj: X-tremely intellectual website
Thank you for the kind words. The trash mail has been very amusing. I
have been rather busy this past month – the march “issue” will come out
in april – but I expect that I will gather the mutant letters together
as a special for the amusement of my readers. The exposure, I suppose,
is good – people who would have never found my site otherwise managed
to stumble into it. The great mutantwatch plague seems to have quieted
down. For a while I was getting three or four times my regular daily
traffic; I still get some extra traffic but the mutantwatch hits have
dropped from about ten thousand a day to about a thousand a day.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/28/2000
Subj: Poker
Randy
As a practical matter you can’t win playing poker in Las Vegas. The situation
is very simple: The house is the big winner. Next come the professionals
who have to be very good in order to scratch out a living. All of this money
comes out of the casual tourists and the many people who think that they are
good players. You’ve got to have a lot of hustle to beat those games. As
someone put it, “These guys fuck you with velvet prophylactics. You don’t
even know you’ve been had until you try to sit down the next day.”
… continued on next rock …
Twenty years ago it would have been a dead cinch that there was collusion
going on, at least in the high stakes games. I don’t imagine that things
have changed all that much.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/21/2000
Subj: Official X-Men Movie
I’m pleased that you enjoyed the site. Many people who followed
that link seemed to think that I was the official maildrop for
mutantwatch.com. I’ve gotten some very brain damaged email in
consequence.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/20/2000
Subj: Hemostasis
I don’t really want to argue origins issues in private email –
I would rather do that in the talk.origins newsgroup which is
a public forum. However the argument that the entire function
is necessary is a dog that doesn’t hunt. It is necessary for
modern vertebrates; however it would not have been for the
presumed ancestor. Before cavalierly dismissing invertebrates
you should go back and read that section more carefully. Note
that fibrinogen is a very old molecule, dating back to before
the vertebrate, invertebrate split.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/13/2000
Subj: car wreaks
I’m sorry but I don’t have any pictures of car wrecks other than
the one on my web site. May one ask *why* you want pictures of
car wrecks?
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/29/2000
Subj: HTML typo
Thanks for the corrections. The “Gender Benders” is indeed a typo although
I do like your interpretation.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 3/30/2000
Subj: Mutations
Thank you for the kind words. My objective was to explain
matters in a way that clear to the intelligent scientific layman.
My objective was both to provide simple, clear explanations and
yet at the same to provide substantive documentation so that
people could see that the explanations rested on real material
of substance.
Return to index of contributors
From: TheVVV
Date: 3/19/2000
Subj:waiting for godot
It’s quite unlikely since it is still under copyright. Check the library
or your favorite bookstore.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 4/17/2000
Subj: Not a mutant…
Thank you for the kind words. I must admit that some of my
responses weren’t precisely courteous. There is only so
much temptation that a man can resist.
Return to index of contributors
Date: 4/18/2000
Subj: Really neat
Grazzi. It’s really very simple. Reality and I have an agreement; I leave it alone and
it leaves me alone.
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Date: 4/20/2000
Subj: Enjoyed the site
You’re welcome and thanks for the kind words. A number of people have said
kind things about my web site but never that I would be a fine model for a future
son. Are you sure you know what you’re asking for?
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This page was last updated April 29, 2000.
It was relocated April 10, 2005
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