Folding in August
When I was running my own (small) company one of my employees had Red Sox schedule posted on his door. He had drawn a dotted line through the middle of the month of August and had added the words, “Fold Here”.
The fate of the Red Sox fan is a sad one. You might think that said fans has nothing to complain about; the Red Sox usually have a winning season. That is the tantalizing thing about the Red Sox. They tease you with the prospect of going all the way and they never deliver, rather like some women I have known and, like said women, they leave a trail of broken hearts behind them.
The Chicago Cubs fan is better off. Being a Cubs fan is like dating the class virgin; you know that you aren’t going to score so you might as well enjoy her personality. These days though the lady seems to be flashing a bit of thigh. I’m not certain as to why the lady is so forward; perhaps it is the presence of Sammy Sosa.
Sammy seems to be the ultimate expression of the Red Sox/Chicago Cubs spirit. For two years running he hit 60 or more home runs in a season, a feat that only two men, Babe Ruth and Roger Maris, had accomplished in the preceding hundred years. This monumental feat was spoiled by the fact that he came in second each time. No other man could have done it. What is more there is a very good prospect that he will do it again. This is coming in second at the very highest of levels.
Some day, it will happen that the Red Sox and the Chicago Cubs meet in a world series. When that day comes, sell your stocks and bonds, liquidate all of your assets, and spend them all in one glorious binge because when that day comes you will know that the end is nigh. You see, neither team can win the world series. The universe will dissolve into chaos before such a thing can happen.
The End of the World as We Know It
I have had an interesting exchange of letters with Glenn Morton about his views about the forthcoming oil crisis. Do take a look at http://home.entouch.net/dmd/Oilcrisis.htm
Yes, he is serious and, yes, he probably is right. Oil production will peak somewhere around 2007-2009. The first of several oil crises will hit before then. By 2020 the oil party will be over; of necessity, oil will no longer be a significant player in the world’s economy as a source of energy.
How this will play is unclear. The Europeans are taking this reasonably seriously. Denmark already gets 20% of its energy from renewable sources. The French have gone nuclear bigtime. The USA has its collective head implanted firmly in its nether regions. Asia (China, India, and Indonesia) is effectively screwed – half the world’s population is trying to industrialize in the face of the collapse of a fundamental resource.
Apres moi, le deluge
Having a bad hair day
I, along with 24,000,000 other Americans watched the Gary Condit interview with Connie Chung. (For my non-American readers, Gary Condit is a member of Congress who was happily having an affair with a young intern named Chandra Levy. Unfortunately for him she turned up missing and his extramarital enterprise has become the focus of a national soap opera.) More precisely, I watched as much of it as my stomach could bear.
Mr. Condit did not do well in his reprise of the Bill Clinton “coming straight with America” act. Clinton may lie through his teeth but he has grace and panache. Mr. Condit looked as though he had a base case of hemmeroids. Definitely a bad hair day.
Speaking of which he needs a new hair stylist. I don’t know if he
wears a hairpiece or not but if that is all his own hair he should
shave his head and wear a wig. It was a very bad hair day.
This page was last updated September 1, 2001.