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October 1998
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The Massachusetts Farmer

A Massachusetts farmer dies and goes to hell. The Devil notices that the farmer is not suffering like the rest. He checks and sees that it’s 90 degrees and about 80% humidity. So he goes over to the farmer and asks why he’s so happy.

The farmer says, “I really like it here. The temperature is just like Massachusetts in September.”

The Devil of course isn’t happy with the farmer’s answer, so he turns up the temperature to 100 degrees and the humidity to 90%. After turning everything up he goes looking for the farmer. He finds him unbuttoning his shirt saying, “This is even better. It’s like Massachusetts in August.”

The Devil is now really upset, and decides to make the farmer understand that hell is no paradise. He turns the heat up to 120 degrees and the humidity to 100%. “Let’s see how he likes it now,” he thinks. But the farmer is taking his shirt off basking in the heat, even happier than before saying, “Wonderful! It’s just like Massachusetts in Mid-Summer!”

The Devil says, “That’s it, I’ll get this guy.” He suddenly turns the temperature down to a freezing -25 degrees. He looks around and finds the farmer jumping up and down for joy.

“What are you so happy about now?” the Devil shouts.

The farmer screams out, “The Red Sox finally won the World Series!”


This page was last updated October 10, 1998.

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October 1998
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