Coin Operated Amusements
Last Thursday I stopped at my favorite adult entertainment complex. I equipped myself with coins and settled myself down at one of the doors. I fed in coins until the veils parted and a zen master appeared before me. He sat in the classic lotus position and smiled mysteriously. I waited. At length he spoke:
"Before I studied Zen the mountains were mountains. While I was studying Zen the mountains were no longer mountains. After I studied Zen the mountains were again mountains."
"And ...," I said, breathing heavily.
"In time the mountains become mountains once again."
Enraged, I fed in more coins until a cudgel appeared. Seizing it, I beat him severely about the head and shoulders until he retched all over me, smiling mysteriously all the while.
Next week I shall sample the rides at the amusement park. I hear they have an excellent Zamboni of the soul.
This page was last updated August 1, 1999.