The gender of household items

Many languages are gendered; that is, every noun is either masculine or feminine. English is not formally gendered; however one can determine the gender of common household items with just a bit of thought. For example:

1. Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.
2. Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It’s an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
3. A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it’s often over-inflated.
4. A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there’s the hot air part.
5. Sponges are Female, because they’re soft, squeezable and retain water.
6. A Web Page is Female because it’s always getting hit on.
7. A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.
8. An Hour glass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.
9. A Hammer is Male, because it hasn’t changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it’s handy to have around.
10. A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it’d be male, didn’t you? But consider this,-it gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!