Rules guys wished girls knew
- If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
- Learn to work the toilet seat; if it’s up, put it down.
- Birthdays, Valentines and anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find
the perfect present once again.
- If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t
want to hear.
- Sometimes we’re not thinking about you. Live with it.
- Sunday Sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. It can’t
be altered so just let be.
- Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss
such topics as sex, shortstops and carburetors.
- Shopping is not a sport
- Anything you wear is fine. Really
- You have enough clothes
- You have too many shoes
- Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don’t work.
- No, we don’t know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a
calendar.
- Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank
range. We’re bound to miss sometime.
- Most guys own two or three pairs of shoes-what makes you think we’d be any
good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
- “Yes” and “No” are perfectly acceptable answers.
- A headache that last for 17 days is a problem. See a doctor.
- Your mom doesn’t have to be our best friend.
- Don’t fake it. We’d rather be ineffective than deceived.
- Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All
comments become null and void after 7 days.
- If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes
you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
- Let us ogle. If we don’t look at other women, how can we know how pretty you
are.
- You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done,not
both.
- Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
- Christopher Columbus didn’t need directions, neither do we.
This page was last updated June 2, 1999.
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