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August 1998
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He fixed the damage, or did he?

This man decided to take off early from work and go drinking. He stayed until the bar closed at 2 AM, by which time he was extremely drunk. When he entered his house, he didn't want to wake anyone, so he took off his shoes and started tiptoeing up the stairs. Half way up the stairs, he fell over backwards and landed flat on his rear end.

That wouldn't have been so bad, except that he had a couple of empty pint bottles in his back pockets, and they broke. The broken glass carved up his buns something terrible. But, he was so drunk that he didn't know he was hurt. A few minutes later, as he was undressing, he noticed blood, so he checked himself out in the mirror, and sure enough, his behind was cut up something terrible. Well, he repaired the damage as best he could under the circumstances, and went to bed.

The next morning, his head was hurting, and he was hunkering under the covers trying to think up some good story, when his wife came into the bedroom. "Well, you really tied one on last night," she said. "Where'd you go?" "I worked late," he said, "and I stopped off for a couple of beers." "A couple of beers? That's a laugh," she replied. "You got plastered last night." "What makes you so sure I got drunk last night, anyway?" Well," she replied, "my first big clue was when I got up this morning and found a bunch of band-aids stuck to the mirror."


This page was last updated August 1, 1998.

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August 1998
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